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Oh My CLUCK! Robert?!

By |September 9th, 2015|

That time I didn’t have to research Sluggo® Slug Bait and interview local snails about their plight was definitely a career high for me. Oh and that year I went to do a story on Poodles in Paris, but my flight somehow got rerouted to a bratwurst festival in Bavaria was also a win. But [...]

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Critic, Collector or Connoisseur…of Bowls?

By |September 2nd, 2015|

I am not a garden hose addict. I’m a connoisseur of fine plastic tubing that happens to be manufactured for the purpose of watering grass and shrubs. There’s a big difference. But try explaining that to my mom or, even worse, my boss at the office. It started last Friday morning following an unfriendly altercation [...]

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One Bully Walks in LA

By |August 26th, 2015|

So my boss recently decided he needed to lose a few lbs/kgs. Having just gone through my mom’s tumultuous sugar detox, I was not looking forward to another authority figure on a diet telling me what to do all day. Yesterday when I got into the office he was doing one-pawed pushups on his desk…or [...]

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BONs Are More BEAUtiful

By |August 12th, 2015|

After taking some time off to hang with me this summer, I encouraged my mom to start teaching yoga again. Like most of my selfless acts, it was just the right thing to do. Coincidentally, having your mom lurk around the office every woofin’ day for three months has its drawbacks. Don’t get me wrong—she’s [...]

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Blondes, Bacons, Bridesmaids and Boats

By |August 5th, 2015|

I have this lawyer named Dad. When he’s not helping me solve important problems, he helps humans get divorced.  It’s called “Family Law” or something like that. And yes, statistically speaking, weddings are good for the family biz.  But don’t get me wrong, he’s not jaded on the whole concept of marriage—he married my mom. All I’m [...]

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Little Black is the New Black

By |July 29th, 2015|

So I don’t tell everybully this, but I speak a bit of Chinese. Mandarin to be exact. Basically it all happened before I knew it happened. I was young and impressionable and my mother, a former resident of Shanghai, decided it would be “cute” if I learned survival Chinese “just in case.” Yes, my accent [...]

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Your California Dream Team

By |July 22nd, 2015|

Clockwise from Left: Wazzy, Maximus, Cobalt, Pork Chop. Last Saturday my mom took me out to Chateau Marmont for a late afternoon bite. With a star-studded line up that never disappoints, it’s by far my favorite place to people watch in Los Angeles and there are always a few celebrity dogs to sniff [...]

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Mom’s The Word

By |July 15th, 2015|

Trust me when I say I was desperate. Two weeks had gone by and I was really adjusting well to life without my mom and without a job. My dad and I were having left overs for breakfast, pizza for lunch and steaks for dinner while my mom turned vegan at some hippie yoga retreat [...]

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#respectthecleft

By |July 1st, 2015|

As most of you know, my mom decided to give up sugar cold turkey and it’s been a rough week. Cold turkey, I learned, has nothing to do with actual turkey. All I can think about is cherry pie—sweet cherry pie with ice cream and fresh homemade whip. Everything happened so fast. Maybe with a [...]

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Bubbles, Trouble and a Family Reunion

By |June 24th, 2015|

I’m an only child. That said, I have tons of cousins and most of my Junes involve family reunions. It gets complicated, but my grandfather’s side has a place on Madeline Island in northern Wisconsin. I know—not exactly bulldog central—but for whatever it lacks in tropical style, it makes up for by not being…Phoenix. My [...]