I’m a metrosexual cat Whose many admirers notice that My nails are clipped, I’m microchipped, And my hirsute neck is set With a leather collar in violet. My thick ginger coat blindly shines With the stolen butters I’ve made mine; Double-0 Seven, Sean Connery, That’s what you’ll think when you see me. As an accomplished [...]
All day long it’s in my head: I love I want I need some bread. Rustic loaves or whole grain slices They're every bit as good as mices, Not to mention an easier catch, And a lot less squiggly going down the hatch. When my love is trapped in cellophane I confess to going a [...]
I like to lie across the stair, Confident I’m most annoying there, And when a dog tries to pass by I growl and give my gimlet eye. If she or he nonetheless proceeds, I unleash a double-swat with my paw, That lands like lightening on their jaw. The kitchen is what I protect, Just two [...]
I arise before the sun, Before My Person’s sleeping’s done, And sit upright upon her chest (The solar plexus works the best). Then, I choose a note that’s just off-key And repeat and repeat atonally: Meow. Meow. Meow. I stare at her and do not blink, Not a single-ingle wink. Spellbound by my unmelody, My [...]
My name is Bob and I’m a cat My selfies can attest to that. My coat is lush with ginger stripes So ladies all over love to Skypes With me. But here’s my nearly tip-top truth: Avocados are my favorite fruit. In general when it comes to food Hungry is my state of mood: Broccoli, [...]
I'm a cat My name is Bob Cleaning counters is my job. The second I see food on them I stuff it in my mouth and then Make a beeline for my bed. When the loot Falls en route The dogs, always in hot pursuit, Pick it up with quick dispatch- One chew, no more, [...]